Ready and Waiting to Fall
[Mae, The Everglow]

Drowning, just as fast as i can.
But don't throw me a line,
don't reach out your hand.
Cause, I'm on the brink of something beautiful
and I want to sing about it,
but I don't know where to begin.
Write it in a letter,
but the words don't come out right.
Trying to explain how no one can do me like.
You don't understand how helpless I can get
Since the day that we met.
Oh can you feel it yet?

It's never been more perfect being alive
I've never been so satisfied. Oh...

I could feel something different for the first time
Heaven made sense and all the words rhymed.
No chance of stopping now. I'm taking it all.
And now I'm caught in the air, its a good glide.
Pass it up, wouldn't dare what a wild ride.
I remember being ready and waiting to fall
just like I did tonight.

Spinning around and around
Until my left was my right and up became down.
With just one look you knocked me off of my feet.
So unable to speak. Oh how you made me weak.
Though it was a while ago, I still can recall.
That moment so ready, and waiting to fall.
Can you take me back in time
remembering when you captured my heart?
Over and over again.

It's never been more perfect being alive
I've never been so satisfied. Oh...

I could feel something different for the first time
Heaven made sense and all the words rhymed.
No chance of stopping now. I'm taking it all.
And now I'm caught in the air, its a good glide.
Pass it up,wouldn't dare what a wild ride.
I remember being ready and waiting to fall
just like I did tonight.

Ready and waiting to fall...

===========================

I've had this song for so long already, but I'm only starting to appreciate the band lately. Great lyrics, good music. Go go go and try this! :D

I spent the entire day eating and sleeping. Haha. Baboy. It’s been a while since I’ve done that – last summer was the most recent, I think. Though I was mostly out during those times. I kind of miss being a bum.

Three more weeks of OJT. Hah. I know it’s still long, but it’s actually quite short when you think about it. :D Actually, it’s three and a half because I lack some hours. I’m gonna have to be at work for 9-10 hours the next three weeks so I would be out of work by the time my Green and White pictorial day comes. So by August, I’m more or less free. Yahoo. I’ll save the “after OJT thoughts” next time, when I’m actually done with it. I have a feeling I’ll be learning some last few lessons the next few weeks.

I was cooking pancit canton earlier and I suddenly realized how much I missed my old roommates. I have nothing against my new roommates – like I said before, I think they’re pretty cute. I guess I just kind of miss my first roommates. Especially the old bondings we used to have. Eating KFC bucket meals and getting the glasses. Going to Greenbelt to food trip (mahal na food trip ano). Eating isaw. Balcony bondings. Monopoly. Hello Queen. Uno Stack-o revelations. Roasting marshmallows over boiling water/candle fire. Chowking Halo halo. Midnight 7-11 trips. Aithne’s “monthly” tidbits about her life. Ynna’s late night questions about life. Janine’s random bursts of craziness. Mito being our “adopted” roommate. The carpenters knocking at random times. Those were the days. Somewhere around the third term those things died down(because two of us suddenly had love lives ) but we still made it a point to have quality times with each other. The year ended quite abruptly for us, that we didn’t have time to say goodbye to each other and have the “ceremonial” goodbye. Then we couldn’t afford to stay in the dorm anymore so we went our separate ways. 

I miss my old room. I miss my roommates.  I miss everything about it.

In memory of our good times.  I miss you all!

But I’m okay with my new room.  I still owe them Cello’s Doughnuts (again, haha!) and I am actually liking it when they can’t figure out something (usually about their love lives haha) and then they all turn to me with matching, “Ate, paano kapag…” Haha. Like I have experience. Right. I like ‘em though.

On other news…I’ll be leaving early tomorrow. Haha. I wish there wouldn’t be any rallies tomorrow in Ayala. It sucks having to walk all the way to Glorietta to ride the MRT to school. Ang layo eh.  Oh well. Oh, and speaking of which, I found the Verse of the Day fitting. I think it’s a sign? :D

God bless everyone. :D

Would you believe that I'm still partly speechless about the camp? Well, in some ways I am. I can't help but smile when I remember the entire thing. Ah. God, You are awesome.

It was actually a normal camp...and I've been to a lot of camps already, I've lost count. I've been serving in YFC for 6 years (5, if you don't count the one year inactivity), but by far, this has been the best camp I've ever been in. From the start of the planning up to its very last minute -- every second of the "camp period" was an amazing display of God's power. Who wouldn't be driven speechless by that? All I could say about the camp was, "Astig. Ang galing." I can't provide any explanation or whatsoever that could probably elaborate how it became so.

On the personal level, God told me a lot of things during the camp. Firstly, I know that my energy for the three days was all from Him and nothing from me -- if I got the strength from myself I wouldn't have been able to stay awake. Second, He reminded me that I'm still His. It's kind of hard to explain here, but during the tongues workshop and the night worship, His message to me was I'm His, and that He is the only one I could live for. Which is what I really needed to know. He showed me how He provides and that I shouldn't worry about money matters. I've spent a lot more than I wanted to spend in the camp, and most of it wasn't for me but for the camp expenses. I didn't feel bad afterwards, though. God bless the timing of the Reuben Morgan ticket selling commission arriving. And though things are still pretty tight with me, I know it's gonna be alright. And finally, He made me realize that He doesn't forget the promises we made with Him. Kind of like in Bruce Almighty, when Bruce told God that he'd meet him on 7:00 on the 7th. He made me realize that He remembers everything we promise Him.

I also realized that I'm getting older, YFC-wise. I hung out with Tuesday and Engel during the second day, and we talked about..."oldie" stuff. Haha. Technically, I'm old in YFC years, but I'm still young in age, but reading Arven's letter told me I act like an "ate" to all of them. Which I would have detested immediately (I don't like being called "ate" because I wasn't used to it), but now I've accepted the fact that, well, I'm getting "older". Haha. Like what I heard from someone when I was still in high school based -- being called an "ate" means you are respected. And I know it entails a lot more responsibility, but I believe God put me here for a reason.

There are a lot more things I could say about the camp, but I'm seriously running out of words. Can I just say? I love it when God leaves me speechless. Weird for someone like me, especially since I love to talk, but somehow, not being able to utter a word seems a lot better than being able to describe every detail. :D

Before I finish this entry, let me do one last honoring to the people who were at the camp. I've been doing honorings since last Saturday, but one more wouldn't hurt. (Though I don't know if they're going to read this. ^^; )

To all the new YFC members: WELCOME TO YFC! I honor you guys for taking the risk of coming to the camp, even if you have absolutely no idea what is going to happen there. I am proud of you all, for committing to Christ and committing to YFC as well. Seeing all of you there in the camp is already a miracle, and seeing you all sing and praise God is even more overwhelming. I hope that you all will see what a wonderful life God has to offer you, and remember that we will all just be here for you, as your new second family. Looking forward to knowing all of you. :D

To all service team: It's been an honor serving with you all. It would not have been the same without you guys. I saw God in each and every one of you, and I am truly blessed to be a part of this family. Like what Rocky said -- this is just the start! We still have a long way to go, and it's not going to be easy, but we're all in this together. I love you all!

To the Docu team: Of course, special mention! Niki, Steph, James, Jay T., Gigie, Prince -- you guys made me proud. I'm blessed to have you all. I'll save the rest of my honorings during our household.

And last, but not the least, To God: Everything starts and ends with You. You're the BEST. You're AWESOME. You're WONDERFUL. I could use all the adjectives I know but I still won't be able to describe You. I don't deserve whatever You bless me with, but still You make me worthy. You love me without conditions, and I can only do so much to return that love. Basta, Lord, MAHAL KITA!

Would you believe I wrote this entry for the entire day? Haha. I did. Now that camp is over...I'm back to normal programming. Not much to look forward to, except for households, but I'm okay. God makes everyday beautiful. :D Yeahbah!

One hour till quitting time here. Haha. God's day everyone, hope you're all fine. :D

I've been left speechless by the camp experience...and I still don't know what to say about it. God is really good though. REALLY and truly good. I know I've said that a lot of times, and I'll never tire of saying it. God is good! God is awesome!

"Don't be afraid...you're [still] mine. I know your heart and I want you to know that I know what you're going through...and I know you want to please me. I want you to know and remember that you're mine. Nothing can change that. And I love you, my daughter."

Thank You Lord.  

You're the only one that I could live for!

Fly Away
By Paul Wright

Well she's got dream dreams like he's got things
That'll open up her sky so she can use her wings to
Fly away
Well she's got dream dreams like he's got things
That'll open up her sky so she can use her wings to
Fly away

She looks out her window
Watching people as they pass on by
Some of them want to come inside
Man oh man, I won- I won- I wonder which one will she trust
Cuz some men only lust
And she wants a man who can understand what a woman wants
And if he can appreciate her
And not deface her
And she wants a king with a diamond ring
Not some prince who's gonna steal everything that he gave her

Chorus:
Yeah she's gotta fly away (uh 1-2, uh 1-2, uh 1-2)
I watch her walk next to you
But soon she's gotta get away (oh that's true, oh that's true, oh that's true)
I hope her dreams do come true
Cuz she is a butterfly
Spreadin' her spreadin' her spreadin' her spreadin' her spreadin' her wings
(she's beautiful, she's beautiful, she's beautiful)

But her heart is a kingdom without a king
And without him she can't sing
So she waits on a watchtower
Hoping, praying, waiting for his arrival (and all the people in the world say)

Chorus

And she wants a family (family)
She wants a lover (lover)
A best friend closer than any other
A man that's true she wants a man who
Can hear God's voice and know what he is called to do
She wants a hard worker not some lazy bum
But a man who knows how to get the job done
She wants a family
To be a mother
And raise a child that came from her

Chorus

Well she's got dream dreams like he's got things
That'll open up her sky so she can use her wings to to to
Fly away
Well she's got dream dreams like he's got things
That'll open up her sky so she can use her wings to to to
Fly away

She's got to fly away (fly away)
She's got to find her way
She's got to fly away

Cuz she's got dream dreams like he's got things
That'll open up her sky so she can use her wings to to to
Fly away

I’m here in the office for the first time this week, and I haven’t done any proper work since I arrived. What did I do for the past hours? Finish my two photo collages for the yearbook (requirements are due this Saturday), make a write-up for Engel (and I have a lot more write ups to write…haha), upload photos in ImageStation (I’m starting to see why Tuesday loves this thing), and…well, blog. Haha. Not good. But my brain’s not working yet. Or, it’s not focusing on work. Which is bad, I know.

The past two days, I was in school, helping with the YFC booth. I was supposed to go to work last Tuesday afternoon but I ended up not going because we finished setting up by lunchtime. So I stayed at the booth and we invited people to the camp. Oh yeah, we also got our first tarpaulin ever – it’s so movie-like. Haha. And we’re planning to have all those tarpaulins saved for the campus tour. Yeahbah!

Anyway, yesterday was a great day, especially during the U-break. We all had fun giving flyers and inviting people to the camp and meeting new YFCs who have yet to make their presence known. It was tiring, but very fun because this is actually something new – people were actually approaching us and saying they want to attend the camp. It’s overwhelming and all we could say is, “Thank You!”

Sometime during the afternoon, I checked my wallet and saw that I only have Php150 left. I wondered where my money went – I just withdrew Php500 the other day. I started computing my day’s expenses and it turns out that I have to pay for the YFC tarpaulin for the moment (which costs Php180), and I will be paid back afterwards (in our terms, padugo). I checked my balance in the bank and I realized that what I have is not as much as I thought I would have – and it’s only the 15th of the month! I started to think of ways how I am going to make that much money fit for the next few weeks, and then I remembered that I have yet to pay for the camp, as well as set some money aside for my cellphone credits. Text brigade for camp and all that. Plus, I didn’t know if there would be other padugo moments and I can’t exactly be selfish on that, right?

All I could do then was sigh and think of ways how to save the money and not go hungry, AND still provide for my other needs – like cellphone load and all that. Then I started panicking and then I resorted to the old saying, God will provide. Which I know He will – while I count my everyday expenses, that is.

When I got back to the dorm after a cheap dinner, I realized that I haven’t read the readings for that day yet. So I opened my Bible and read the first reading, and God spoke to me through this:

“And God is able to fill you with every good thing, so that you have enough of everything at all times, and may give abundantly for any good work.”
- 2 Corinthians 9:8

Affirmation? I think so. God assured me then that He’s taking care of me, and that I should not worry about how I will survive the next few weeks with the cash I have. He’s telling me to trust Him, that He would most definitely provide for me – for my food, my load, as well as those padugo moments in YFC. And because of that, I was filled with peace with the entire matter – Kayo na po bahala, Lord!

True enough, He provided for me earlier. Jomar treated me my lunch as he gave me the CDs I will do reviews for and other post Reuben Morgan things. Thank You, my awesome God.

So now, I’m supposed to work. Or at least, “work". I should get the other write-ups done na, noh? :D God’s day!

When God Made You
by Newsong feat. Natalie Grant 

It’s always been a mystery to me
How two hearts can come together
And love can last forever
But now that I have found you, I believe
That a miracle has come
When God sends the perfect one
Now gone are all my questions about why
And I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life

Chorus:
I wonder what God was thinking
When He created you
I wonder if He knew everything I would need
Because He made all my dreams come true
When God made you
He must have been thinking about me

I promise that wherever you may go
Wherever life may lead you
With all my heart I’ll be there too
From this moment on I want you to know
I’ll let nothing come between us
And I will love the ones you love
Now gone are all my questions about why
And I have never been so sure of anything in my life

Chorus:
I wonder what God was thinking
When He created you
I wonder if He knew everything I would need
Because He made all my dreams come true
When God made you
He must have been thinking about me

Bridge:
He made the sun
He made the moon
To harmonize in perfect tune
One can’t move without the other
They just have to be together
And that is why I know it’s true
You’re for me and I’m for you
Cause my world just can’t be right
Without you in my life

Chorus:
I wonder what God was thinking
When He created you
I wonder if He knew everything I would need
Because He made all my dreams come true

Tag chorus:
He must have heard every prayer I’ve been praying (I 've been praying)
Yes He knew everything I would need
When God made you (I thank God he made you)
When dreams come true (you are my love my love)
When God made you He must have been thinking about me

 

Again, you may download the song by clicking on the title.